Schhhhtuff.
My iPod is quickly dying so as a replacement I’m going to get an iTouch. I was going to get an iPhone until I remembered that they’re iDiotic (iJokes are never tiresome). I came across this website that had designer protective cases and have fallen in love with a few. The best of the best being the ones I’ve displayed above. I’m definitively getting the “Lift” one (bottom right) because the illustration is done by one of my favourite illustrators. Her name is Jaime Zollars. I was going to write this great long opus about Artists not really being artists when they whore themselves out to Apple or Third Party Developers. Then I realized I was writing about buying an iTouch and purchasing designer protective covers.
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I am generally pretty "fit" these days *lights cigarette / coughs* but recently I’ve become obsessed with pursuing defined abs -- or rather being in the 5%-10% body fat club which is akin to being in a physique-conscious version of the Mensa Club . If you’re not an athlete or it’s not in your profession’s job description (model etc..) to have a defined abdomen then it’s rather vain in having one. In fact, I think it is all very vain – this pursuit of mine. However, it’s on my To Do list and I just want to relish in the celebratory manner by which I’d be
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With regards to this end is nigh bidness that is the LHC there are two camps of thought; The uninformed crazies who reckon the world is going to self-implode in a clusterfuck of being uninformed or unqualified to think this way. Then the scientists who actually know a lil sumfin' sumfin' cuz theyz gotz they strtcreds @ da mawfuckiin M.I.T., [/\sheeyit/\] betches… and can give you statistics of the probability of us all dying from a rather large round expensive piece of underground scientific thingamajig simply known as the LHC. I was reading some article by Stephen Hawking and he’s basically the smartest man currently living. He’s all like “*bleep bloop* there’s less than 1% *bleep bloop* chance of anything happening at all *bleep bloop*” Some scientists are of the opinion that within this 1% chance of ‘anything’ happening, there’s a 50/50 chance of a “Microscopic Blackhole” forming. Now, let me just say, I don’t know much about Blackholes. I know that Blackholes are bodies of space that have the gravitational force to suck in Planets and entire Galaxies, right. I also know that their gravitation pull is strong enough to actually fucking bend light (le quoi le fuck tu dis moi maintenant???). I also know that for a blackhole to become such, it must be powered by the force of a collapsing star/sun (am I right physics geeks?). I seem to remember something about Event Horizon and once you reach that point there’s no turning back and something about time becoming still or some crap like that. I know that blackholes are an integral part of learning about time-travel too. Don’t believe me? click this you Donnie Darko loving bitches. Apart from that, Blackholes are bad. Like really bad. They are, essentially, God’s/The Universe’s Epic Fail switch. It’s lights out baby, literally (I just made a physics joke, fuck me). If you died from a blackhole, let’s imagine, can you think of all the bragging rights you’d have in the afterlife? That’s all sorts of heavy drama right there. So when a scientist says “The worst that would happen is it would create a bunch of microscopic blackholes” I’m of the opinion to say “Well, WHAT THE FUCK IS A MICROSCOPIC BLACKHOLE EXACTLY????”. I typed in microscopic blackhole in Wikipedia and nothing came up. I'm not a smart man but I’ll assume a microscopic blackhole is exactly that – a mini version of the most powerful phenomena known to the universe. It’s sort of like spending 5 billion dollars on cloning and genetically re-engineering a 1 foot tall version of me. The end result would be the same with the addition of a mini version of myself running rampant being a menace to society as it relates to Tyrannical Acts of Dryhumping. So, ultimately, the LHC was birthed from some conversation that went kind of like this; “So, hey Bob, wouldn’t it be super rad if we like, created an experiment that mimicked the few seconds after The Big Bang?? We could kinda sorta like, play God as a means to learning neat things and stuff!” , “OMG SAMEZIES, that’s so totally worth doing. I’ve a rich uncle, let’s get on that!”. I think scientists ought to really give things a think through before they actually start doing them. Also, FTW, why weren’t people (read: humanity) given a say in all this, initially (10 or so years ago)? In conclusion, they only start the high-acceleration proton smashing on October 21st. Estimates (guesstimates) state there's around a 1/1000 chance of a Blackhole being generated but even if it did it would dissipate almost instantly. It should also be stated that if a Blackhole is formed at any point during these experiments, Stephen Hawking automatically gets a Nobel Prize, for his theories/work will have been proven correct. That's the word on the street. Anyway, my head now officially hurts.
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HEY SAS OR SEANSKI OR WHATEVER GH3Y NICKNAME YOU GO BY.
WHY DON'T YOU STICK YOUR P UP YOUR A
AND GO F YOURSELF[SKI]?
( EXCUSE ME SIR? )