Fashionistas. We don't need ya!

"I keep singing to the sky. There's a risk it won't reply."

If I had one vote and one vote only, I'd nominate All Bran's Chewy Bars for the greatest edible innovation of modern times. Shit is brilliant. And so's your mawfuckin' face.

Last night I had this clusterfuck of a dream. Basically what had happened was I was taken back in time to the 50's. Barack Obama and myself were solving a mystery that unfolded at The White House. In my dream, I remember thinking that Obama was exactly as I thought he would be -- awesome! He was very thoughtful and curious about everything and well-mannered. He took an interest in all things I had to say. Then, in my dream, my girlfriend (who was a slight amalgamation of certain females in my life or tv) had fallen victim to becoming addicted to heroin. Then her best friend became addicted to heroine as well. It turned out that Cook from the UK drama series Skins, had been responsible for their heroine addiction. He wanted to kill me, in my dream, and he had awful teeth -- also a wretched stench about him. Then Barack Obama held a BBQ on the front lawn of the White House and we all had a great time. It should be observed that I had steak and mashed potatoes. There was a dance scene that unfolded in a UK nightclub that was situated inside the White House and we danced to MGMT whilst I drank a banana-flavoured Italian Soda (which I love a lot in real life). Effy was there. Cook then approached me and said he no longer wanted to kill me. The hate was off, as he put it, and that he "fuckin' loved me man", before placing a peck on my cheek. I blushed because apparently I'd have forgiven the fact that he got my GF addicted to heroine?! Then I was entering my apartment whereupon a troll attacked me and rendered me dead.

Mmm, I think to put this into better perspective, I awoke from this dream at 4AM muttering an audible "What the fuck?". Additionally, I woke up with a very bad tooth ache that has not subsided.

I have not seen last night's offering of Lost, yet, and that's a priority either tomorrow or Saturday. If anyone discusses this, I shall stab you in the penis/vagina. Cheers!

In closing, this is a massive massive massive song. Jewno? Fuck the Klaxons. *achooies*

Current Music: maps

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